The Art of Getting What You Want: 3 Techniques to Grow Confidence

2020-21 has been exceedingly difficult for all of us and our confidence has been shaken. Stories of hardship, stress, loss dominated the headlines and bled into our personal lives as well. We hunkered down and are now beginning to emerge to test the landscape and see for ourselves what is safe and how we react.

How are we supposed to magically reset ourselves to pre-pandemic times? How do we navigate change, adjust professionally and personally and regain control of our lives? Below are three powerful techniques that will grow your confidence, help you form new and important relationships and even land a promotion at work.

1- Cut yourself some slack. The idea that we can simply pop back to our lives before March of 2020 is ludicrous and implies that what we’re still navigating through was no big deal. This was ginormous and each of us suffered in our own ways. We crawled kicking, complaining and ranting about our loss of many things. It only makes sense that it will take time for each of us to find our way, adjust our lives and remember the perilous road we were forced to journey down.

Consider taking time to review where you were in the first half of 2020. How you felt and how little you could do. No family or friends to visit. No dining out. No sports. Yuck! Learning to work remote (kind of nice) Zoom meetings this and Zoom meetings that – it was a learning curve for us all. So, give yourself time and room to repair your mental and physical self. Cutting yourself slack will allow you to adapt to regaining your freedom of movement, decide who you are as we slowly reemerge and what truly matters most to you. And, your confidence will grow as well.

2) Removing fear grows confidence big time and helps to propel you toward the things you want as well as eliminating the things that no longer serve you. This can include people, possessions, a job, a habit. Make no mistake; this is an art. It takes practice. And, it works!

Consider the options because you have options. There are always options. However, if you want to achieve more and grow your confidence then it’s time to have a chat with yourself about the ways you confront the unknown and fear. I’ll admit that not knowing can be stressful, bring on anxiety and magnify fear. Confidence decreases, productivity can diminish and fear can nestle in. Try this instead.

Talk out loud about what is bugging you to the point of fear. Discuss with others you trust. Write down the reason you’re in the position that is stunting your confidence. Be honest. And then, come to terms and make an agreement with fear. Let fear know that you acknowledge its existence. Let fear know that you appreciate that it is there to help and warn you. Finally, thank fear and let it know that if you need it to pop up, you’ll be the first to let it know. This allows you to stress less, grow confidence and aim towards that which matters to you the most.

3) Growing confidence takes practice. Everyone works at this and achieves the most incredible things. Think of someone you admire. Ask yourself (or them if you can) if they ever lacked confidence. Of course, the answer is always yes. However, it’s the journey to confidence that matters. Building upon this often comes from not giving up. It’s that simple and that difficult at the same time. Not giving up has a funny way of moving us forward even if it’s an inch at a time. Gone is fear & replaced by vision, confidence albeit shaky at times to achieve more of what you want.

Albert Einstein said it best “It’s not that I’m so smart. I just stay with problems longer.”

Yeah, he is that smart, but his words mean so much more. Getting what you want is an art. Growing confidence can be achieved. It takes time and is worth it. Look what Albert accomplished.